dark wishes
by reooo
Summary: In this one jane did't stop lisbon from leaving and months later on her engagement day jane pops up and some thing happen that turn her whole new life upside down ..reviews appreciated .
1. Chapter 1

_**English isn't my first language so sorry for any mistakes ..reviews are appreciated so tell me if you like it or not .**_

_**Disclaimer :I don't own any thing .**_

…_**...**_

_Teresa lisbon woke up from a very deep sleep to open her eyes to a sunny new day , a day that was supposed to be one of the unforgettable days of her life.. her engagement party was to start in a few hours ._

_she should have been feeling excited and thrilled like any other girl but that wasn't the case instead she had a funny a feeling in her stomach and a little nausea instead ._

_pike was out of town in a case but his flight was set to bring him back just in time for the party ._

_the phone rang and lisbon groaned when she found that the caller was pike's sister emily so she put on a fake smile as if emily could see her before picking up 'hello emily ..every thing alright ?'_

_her soon to be sister in law laughed and told her that she was just checking on her and told her about some details she added to the preparations as if lisbon really cared ._

_pike's sister was the one who took care of every thing even she was the one who insisted to make the engagement party ..marcus asked her if she minded that and she said no ._

_actually she was relieved ..she already had many things on her mind since she moved to DC with adjusting to new job and life was enough ..she didn't want more responsibilities ._

_after she hung up with pike's sister she got up, went to the bathroom and after a shower she checked her phone and found a voice mail from jane ,she felt a sharp pain in her heart for a moment before she cleared her throat and listened to the message ._

'_**teresa ..it's me I know you probably are still pissed at me since you didn't send me an invitation to the party ..last time was bad and I made a mistake but we need to talk ..i am here in DC and I amnot leaving untill we talk , so meet me in the coffe shop at the end of the street you live in in an hour '.**__with that the message ended and she could breathe again ..she was fazed for a moment but recovered and her anger was creeping now again ._

'_How dare he come face me again after every thing he did in miami and on the day of my engagement ' she thought ._

_So she decided that she wasn't going to meet him and went through her morning routine but she felt that ache in her brain and heart and thought for a minute that it could be the last time to see him before committing to pike eternally since she still wasn't wearing a ring , not untill the party so after second thought she put on jeans and shirt and went to meet him ._

_she went and he wasn't there ..she checked her watch and found out she was five minutes early so she took a seat and ordered her coffe ..her hands were shaking ..her heart was beating like a rock band drum untill she saw him entering the place he had that disheveled wild look he had when he came back from the island and he was thinner his eyes smiled when landed on her and he waved ._

'_hello lisbon its been a while__ ..__how are you doing '__he said as he took the opposite seat 'I am fine 'she said quickly , she wasn't going to show him how every thing that happened had affected her, she was a bride and happy that's what she is gonna show him even if it wasn't completely true ._

_He gave her the sad smile the one she had seen a lot since he knew she was leaving ..no since she stared dating pike ._

'_what are you doing here jane ,I think I made it clear that I didn't want to see you or hear from you 'she knew she was being harsh from the hurt look in his eyes but she knew that it had to be done ._

'_I wanted to apologize to you for every thing I did and I wanted to tell you why I did it 'he said seriously and she could hear her blood bounding in her ears ._

'_I love you teresa I am sorry I couldn't tell you then but it was so hard for me but I decided that you diserved to hear it before you start a new life with another man '._

_She was now gasping for air she didn't know if he really said that or if it was just a figment of her imagination , was every thing a dream was he even really here , her thoughts were interrupted by the waiter and she came back to reality to realize what he had just said and all she could feel was pain and hurt .. why did he let her suffer all those years letting her think that her love was unrequited ..why didn't he say some thing before she gave up and left with another man ..why tell her now when she was going to be engaged in a few hours ..was it a new con of his to make her cancel every thing and run back to him to be a convenience again ..no ._

_Her anger took the best of her and she felt her self talking but with a voice full of pain and hate and venom , a voice that was't hers .._

'_I hate you patrick jane and I don't want to ever see you again 'she hissed and she saw him shaking and his face turned white as she got up and left the place ._

_She walked through a nearby park stunned by every thing that happened in the past hour ._

_ she bottled every thing in and just kept walking untill she collapsed on a bench crying and shaking her head in her hands ..she didn't know why was she crying exactly but she did , untill she felt a hand on her shoulder when she looked up she found a little blond beautifull girl with with bright golden eyes in a red dress with matching ribbon in her hair and knew she must have looked so bad to get the attention of the little girl , she asked her 'are you okay ?' ._

_Lisbon wiped her tears with her hand and smiled at the sweet little girl 'yes I am ..thank you dear '._

'_tell me what's bothering you may be I can help ' the girl said ._

_Teresa sighed and shook her head ' no I don't think anything can help me '._

_The girl shook her head 'no way ..there must be some thing to help , you know that girl rose in my class was annoying me and I wished she would leave me alone and then her parents moved and she left school ..there must be some thing you wish too '._

_All teresa could see then was jane lying to her .. jane leaving for six months ..jane going away with erica and kissing lorelei ..jane leaving her on a beach in the sunset in the middle of nowhere ..jane killing red john and running for two years ..the blue bird ..tell her more lies an hour ago trying to mess with her head again ._

'_yes , I wish he would just get out of my life ' said lisbon with another fit of rage staring at the beautifull bond that reflected the sun rays that suddenly started dimming when she looked up to see the thick clouds rolling in so when she looked beside her to say something to the little girl she didn't find her ..she disappeared ,lisbon looked around but the girl was no where to be seen so lisbon just shrugged 'she had a party to get ready for '._

_She went back to her apartment holding herself willing not to think about every thing that happened today ._

_The party was beautifull and well organised , obviously pike's sister did good job ..all she could think of the whole party was not her fiance but jane and not in a good way but she was just praying he wouldn't come and mess with her and ruin the party ._

_She had hard time smiling showing every body how happy she was espicially pike ._

_She smiled her first real smile when she saw her old team and older team ._

_She was happy to meet abbot's wife lisa for the first time ..she was a sweet lady but apparently tough enough to keep her husband in line ..she was the real boss at home ._

_A pregnant grace hugged her tightly smiling and she noticed the looks she and wayne gave cho and realised that cho must have told them about ever thing that happened with jane in miami and the fact that she didn't invite him probably confirmed their information ._

_They were catching up with things , grace kept talking about maddy proudly and cho of course talked so little when they were interrupted by cho's cell phone ringing he excused them and two minutes later he came back white face and uncertain look in his eyes that got them all worried ._

_Rigspy was the one to ask first 'what wrong ,what was that call about ?'_

_Cho cleared his through obviously trying so hard to keep right face 'it's jane …he died '._

_**Sorry for the cliffhanger and there's more to the story so tell me if you want it to continue .**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**The fastest update ever ..thank you for all the lovely reviews and follows ...sorry for any mistakes .**_

_**Disclaimer :I don't own anything .**_

…_**..**_

_**I wake up into a nightmare .**_

_**Looking out for you to take away my fear .**_

_**but you're gone and i can't forgive you .**_

_**for not taking me with you .**_

_Dead jane wasn't something she had never thought of on the contrary she had seen him die hundreds of times in her nightmares mostly by the hands of red john but she had never once thought that it would be a stupid accident that take away his life._

_She just couldn't believe that patick jane was crushed by a piano and forty minutes after she had left him ,the first time she heard it she ran away until she was alone and started laughing like crazy until she burst to tears and that was the only time she cried for him since the accident ._

'_the ropes were so tight and every thing was perfect until he passed under the building and ...that shouldn't have happened 'said one of the workers ._

_And now she was standing infront of jane's grave she didn't cry ..didnt scream ..all she felt numb, the pain in her guts and heartache ..and hollowness …it was all too much to be expressed by any thing but silence ._

_she just wanted this to be another nightmare because her mind just still couldn't deal with janes death ..she wasn't ready ,probably never will be ._

_and now she was in his funeral surrounded by all of their friends in black and all she wanted was to run away or scream or hit something but instead she gave her fiancé a faint smile when he took her hand in his ._

_the funeral ended beautifully and every body started leaving and when the team asked her if she would join them for dinner she refused politely and thanked them ..all of them were obviously worried about her sanity but she didn't really care for any thing at the moment ._

'_I am sorry Teresa but I have an important meeting now will you be okay alone ?'pike asked and she nodded quickly ' yes its fine '._

_She actually was relieved , she didn't want to be touched , she didn't want to be around people and that was the best thing about marcus he never really asked twice or looked in things too deeply ,he was nothing like …jane ._

_she couldn't get herself to leave for along time after every body left , as if her feet were glued to the ground so she just kept staring at the name carved in stone even after the rain started falling ._

_She wasn't bothered by the rain , she liked it may be it would wake her up and she would find herself at the CBI head on her desk and jane on the opposite couch in her office sleeping ._

_She looked up for a moment and looked around the cemetery which was empty except for some one far away staring at her from behind the graves , she blinked and looked again and she was still there ,the blond girl in red dress she met in the park that day ._

_A thousand question ran through her mind 'what was a little girl doing there alone ?' who was she ?what the hell did she want ? and before her mind deal with those questions her mouth opened and called the girl 'hey ..you ' ._

_The red girl ran away immediately and Lisbon found herself running after her and some where between the graves the girl disappeared ..and Lisbon couldn't believe she lost her so with a sigh of frustration she turned around to head back when she found a big hall , a one that wasn't there before ,could it have been here and she missed it ._

_She wasn't in a good state of mind so she believed that it could happen may be soon she would see flying pigs ._

_She peeked through the glass windows of the white hall and all she saw was an old woman sitting alone between many empty chairs , maybe it was a place for private funerals or something ..she didn't know ._

_She slowly walked in and the woman didn't react ,as if she hadn't heared her and Teresa shivered so she rubbed her bare wet arm with her hand and took a deep breath 'I am sorry madam ..but I need to ask did you see a young girl dressed in red ? is she with you ? ' teresa asked curious about that whole weird situation ._

_The woman still didn't turn around or make any move at all ' you got your wish too 'she said as a statment not a question and Teresa was stunned for a moment not really knowing what the woman was talking about ._

'_I am sorry what do you mean ..what wish ?' she asked and the woman as if she hadn't heared her at all spoke again ' she will be watching you ..she like it ' ._

_Lisbon shook her head slowly 'what ? where is the girl ?' she asked before hearing a sound that startled her ..the thunder , she turned her head to the source of the sound and watched trees branches resisting the wind attacks ..the storm was so soon ._

_When she turned around again the woman wasn't there and she gasped , there was only one door here ..may be jane took her sanity away too ..maybe that shouldn't surprise her ._

…

_The platform was so crowded one second and empty the other one as the train left , she was standing there alone ..not completely , jane was standing on the other side looking so beautifull in one of his dark blue old three piece suits ._

_He was smiling at her a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes and all she could do was stare , it had been a week and she missed those eyes so much that it physically hurt ._

_They kept staring at each other until a little girl appeared from behind Patrick to stand beside him and take his hands in hers , Teresa blinked twice and gasped , that wasn't just the girl , she was the blond girl in red dress from the funeral , she smiled at Teresa calmly and before Teresa could say anything or move another train passed between them and moments later ,the train was gone and they weren't there , jane nor the girl ..she gasped fighting tears , the girl took him away , they both vanished and again she was all alone ._

' _no 'she gasped and marcus hand rubbed her arm 'it's okay Teresa , its just a nightmare '._

_She took a few deep breathes to calm down as jane had taught her , after all it wasn't her first nightmare and she knew it wouldn't be the last ._

'_I am fine ,thank you 'she said as she sobered and pike nodded ' you want to talk about it ?' he asked softly and she shook her head firmly ' no'._

_So he nodded again before laying back and he put a hand on her waist embracing her tightly and she fought the urge to pull away , she didn't know why but since that day she hadn't felt comfortable at being touched by him but tried not to show it much so she waited until he was asleep and slipped away from his embrace and turned her back to him curled gripping the covers tightly ._

_As she closed her eyes again her mind started flipping through every thing that happened that day ..the funeral ..the little girl ..the old woman words like echo in her head ' you got your wish too ' said the woman , it just didn't make any sense ._

_she knew that all those weird events had to be connected to jane's death but she didn't know how ..actually she knew that if she told any body she would sound crazy ..well even she was doubting her own sanity but still couldn't make any thing of it ._

_so she decided not to think about any of it at the moment and think of some thing else ,some thing that usually soothed her to sleep , a happy memory with a bright smiling jane , she would just pretend that he was safe and happy and alive on the island maybe , like she used to do when he was on the run ._

_that was her last thought before drifting to sleep . _

_**let me know what you think ..reviews are very nice .**_


	3. Chapter 3

**_thanks for your lovely reviews and follows and still sorry for any mistakes ._**

**_ Elc41 : i have never really seen 'A wonderful world' but she will definitely realize that ._**

**_LouiseKurylo : she didn't really wish for his death ,she only wished he would get out of her life but not die ._**

**_milka : it will all be explained but not yet ;) ._**

**_Disclaimer : i don't own any thing ._**

* * *

><p><em>A few days passed and the life went on at least for every body else except for Teresa Lisbon .<em>

_she still couldn't understand how can every body around her forget and go back to normal , marcus was still working and asking her to go out for dinners with him and her boss told her that they had a new case that needed their concentration ._

_Patrick jane died and the world didn't stop moving , the sun still rose and she just wanted to scream at every body or yell in the middle of the street 'patrick jane is dead ' ._

_The shock was over , she knew he was dead and she was never going to see him again but she didn't know what to do with her life when a part of her was missing all the time so to prevent herself from breaking down , she did what she was good at ..bury herself in work until she was too exhausted to do anything but sleep , not that pike approved but he gave her the space she needed ._

_It was a big case and the victim was a young FBI agent so it was their priority ._

_ she went to talk to the agents mother who was a loner woman ,her daughter was married and lived in another state, so basiclly her son was the closest person to her and she was devastated ._

_the old woman opened the door and Lisbon heart ached ..her red eyes and messy short hair said a lot about her state and Lisbon hated that she had to talk to her now ._

'_I am agent Lisbon ..mrs hambton can I come in ?' lisbon asked politely and the woman smiled and let her in ._

_Lisbon finished all the questions she needed to ask as soon as she could and had hard time listening to the woman talking about life and death without running away and to her relief the door bell rang and the woman went to open the door ._

_the visitor was a brunette in her mid fifties dressed in coloured clothes and wore too many accessories and Teresa recognized the out fit right away , she was obviously a gypsy ._

_but what was she doing there was what Lisbon found hard to figure out because obviously she wasn't a friend to mrs hambton who was a classic blond rich lady ._

_after a few minutes mrs hambton approached Teresa with the woman in her trails and turned around to introduce them 'zora , this is agent Lisbon , she is investigating sam's murder '….' agent Lisbon this is zora she is trying to help me too ' said the woman with a hopeful smile ._

_Lisbon stood up and shook the woman's hand before speaking ' help you ..how are you helping her exactly zora 'she asked although she already knew the answer but had to hear it from the woman herself ._

_the woman didn't look worried but smiled confidently ' I am a psychic ..and I am trying to get an insight that might help knowing who did this '._

_Teresa gave an unlady snort and shook mrs hambton hand before walking in the direction of the door ._

_she heared zora call after her ' you don't have to be like that agent , don't let the pain turn you to some one that you're not '._

_Lisbon was completely unfazed by the woman's words after all she had seen jane do that like a thousand times but that didn't stop her anger at the woman ..how dare she cold read her infront of the victims mother just probably to show off her abilities to ask for bigger amount of cash ._

_so lisbon turned around slowly and didn't try to disguise her anger as she talked bitterly ' oh please I have known much better con men or in your case women ..i will do better at hiding the dark shadow under my eyes the next time '._

_the woman gave her a sad smile completely un affected by her words at all ' he knew you didn't really mean it 'she said ._

_Lisbon frowned ' what are you talking about ?' she asked a little confused ._

_lisbon saw the look in the womans eyes , it was sympathetic not arrogant ' when you told him you hated him ..he knew that you didn't really mean it '._

_Lisbon was crushed by the woman's words , she had hard time keeping straight face as she turned around and left , she didn't want them to witness her break down so she did good job holding herself until she made it to the car ._

_she didn't think much about how the woman knew her last words to jane before he died ._

_she was affected by the words them selves ..the memory its self ._

_ever since that day she had managed well to block that memory away ,she couldn't handle it ._

_she couldn't live with the fact that jane told her he loved her , that's what he said ' teresa I love you ' and she told him to that she hated him and never wanted to see him again ._

_how could she let her anger blind her that much , she hadn't even realized what he had said then and all she could see was him trying to control her life again so she didn't want to hear him ._

_she can see it all play in her mind now slow motion and let herself zoom his facial expressions and saw it all again the surprise, betrayal , pain ._

_and now he was dead and she won't be able to redeem that , he would never hear her apologize or tell him her true feelings , she would never be able to tell him how much she loved him ._

' _what did I ever do in my life to diserve to live for the rest of my life with such pain ' she cried ..her sobs hard and loud ._

_she stayed in the car for ten minutes sobbing until she could finally control her self and started the engine ._

…_she called her boss and took the rest of the day off , she was in no shape to be in the office so she went home and thanked god that marcus left the day before for a case in paris ._

_her plan was to drink herself to sleep but that didn't go so well , after the third glass of wine she was intetrrupted by a phone call from vanpelt who made the habit of calling her at least twice a a week since the accident to check on her ._

' _hello grace how are you doing ?' Lisbon asked trying to sound as normal as possible and she could hear maddys cries before crace talked ' I am fine but how are you Teresa , are you ok ?' _

_Lisbon giggled at her honesty and the fact that she didn't try to disguise her worry ' I am ok grace ,never better ' oh ..oh ..she knew she was busted as soon as the words left her mouth , they were janes favourite words and she always knew that he was nothing near good when she heared them ._

'_I know you arenot ok Teresa ' said grace in soft voice and Lisbon swallowed a lump in her throat before answering almost begging her ' please ..grace , I don't want to talk about it ' ._

_grace got the plea in her voice and decided not to push too much so she changed the subject 'ok tell me about your day , any interesting cases ' talking about the job was always the safest conversation ._

_Lisbon appreciated grace's understanding and went on telling her about the case and the latest office news 'you know I met a psychic today at the victim's mother house '._

_grace hesitated a little before asking ' really, did she say some thing about …'_

_Teresa immediately regretted bringing that up ' you can say his name ' she said firmly and felt bad , she knew that all grace had was good deeds so softened a bit ' grace , it doesn't matter …there are no things such as psychics , isn't that what jane said all the time '._

' _jane could be wrong , I already told you before that my cousin Yolanda is one ' she said and Teresa remembered that conversation when the team was having dinner , it was vanpelts first case and she could remember jane of course telling her that her cousin was dishonest or delusional or both ._

'_I think you just forget that jane was only human , he could make mistakes ' grace said and Teresa could hear maddy's cries grow louder so in a hast grace excused her self and said good bye ._

_she swallowed her forth glass of wine thinking about what grace just said , she knew that jane was just human although she forgot that some times when he was extremely irritating her or giving her one of his cold shoulders ._

_she also knew that he made many mistakes , how could she not know when what brought him to her was the biggest mistake in his life ._

_but she had to admit that sometimes she was completely charmed by him that she saw him some thing more , he could just give her a look or smile and she would follow him to hell ._

_omg .. she knew she was always scared of how much affect he had on her and watching lorelei's loyalty to red john made her wonder if she was that much different ..of course she wasn't a mistress of a serial killer but how many times had she covered for janes lies and mistakes , he even killed a man who wasn't red john and her first thoughts then were ' is he alright ? how am I gonna get him out of it ? ' _

_even after he killed red john every body was horrified by his ability to strangle the man in cold blood but all she thought was that she hoped it would ease his pain a bit after every thing the man did to him ..she excused him ._

_she knew why she did it all ..it was so obvious ..she was in love with him then too and it hadn't changed ._

_she rubbed her face with her hand trying to remember what even brought it all up ? oh..that psychic ._

_she knew that con men would know that she had lost some one she loved but wouldn't know ' their exact last words to them '_

_now she was flipping through her numbers , pressed the call button when she heared his cheerfull voice ' hello, agent Lisbon ..how are you , we really miss you here '._

_she smiled as nostalgia hit her 'missed you too wiley , i need a favor ' she asked him to get every thing he could about that woman zora ' um..no body know about that , wiley ..not even cho' she needed to be sure no body know about that , she really didn't need the questions especially from cho ._

' _sure , wont say a word 'he said and she thanked him ._

_that's why she called him , she could call any one of her new colleagues but she didn't really trust any of them , she hadn't really made much friends and she knew it was mostly her fault becasue of not really trying that hard ._

_she fell asleep in her place on the couch when the phone rang not after more than five minutes and wileys name appeared on the screen , her back was sore and she wished marcus had the same taste jane had in couches ._

' _yes wiley , got me the information ' she asked and heard the young man hiss and she could imagine him hiding in one of the interrogation rooms and a smile light her face at the kid innocence ._

' _yes , the woman was clean I even made the finger print trick you talked about before , still nothing , she really worked as a psychic but never been reported or arrested ._

' _um ..give me her address 'asked Lisbon ._

…_.._

_Lisbon was a little light headed and knew she shouldn't probably be driving but she didnt really care after all she had drunk about half a bottle of wine ..not that drunk ._

_she stopped at the carnival , there were many tents and many people , fire and colours and she could here children laughing and she felt little dizzy ..its like there was some thing weird in the air , some thing like ..magic ._

_she asked about zora and a man pointed at a certain tent ._

_she didn't know what she was really doing there , but she had that feeling that if she was gonna find one thing that make sense of the mess –so called her life , she 's gonna find it there ._

she stumbelled and literally fell into the tent and heared some gasps when she got up to her feet ..ok she was a little drunk .

the brunette woman gave her an annoyed but knowing glare as if she knew she was waiting for herand smiled to the man and woman sitting infront of her who were dressed in a very classic expensive clothes and she could smell the womens expensive perfume a mile away .

'we will talk again ..just give it to him and in two days what you want shall be done 'said the gypsy woman to her client as she handed her a plastic bag which obviously contained some kind of brown and yellow leaves .

'thank you 'said the good looking rich old woman and with that they left .

the woman took another look at lisbon and moved to a corner and lisbon couldnt help but ask 'what was that you gave her '.

the woman smilled her back ot her ' it's a potion ' she said simply and lisbon giggled 'oh ..you make love potions , the woman's husband is gonna leave her for a younger girl and she want him in love with her again '

the woman seemed unfazed by lisbon mockery tone and talked again 'no ..its a hate potion obviously the woman's son fell in love with the wrong girl '.she said bitterly as she turned around with a cup of some hot liquid .

lisbon fell in a chair and the other woman handed her the cup and she eyed it suspiciously ' it will help you sober and calm down ' said zora .

'wrong girl according to who ' lisbon asked as she took a sip of the cup ..it tasted good .

the woman remained calm and shrugged 'i dont know nor care ...we do our job and take the money ..we dont ask or judge ..thats the only way to live in peace '.

lisbon hesitated then talked again ' I am sorry but I don't really believe in all of this '

the woman giggled then sighed 'oh .. if you don't ,the what are you doing here , agent lisbon '.

' I came here to ask you how you knew our last words we said to each other ' .said lisbon having a very hard time keeping straight voice and the woman sighed ' you can feel it teresa inside you ..he was the one who told me '.

lisbon cleared her throat confused ' I don't understand , who ? ' , she actually had a headache and that thing she was drinking didn't help much .

_'the blond man following you every where ..he told me ' Lisbon didn't see that coming and her brain was on fire now and her surroundings were getting fuzzier, she really shouldn't have drank that much wine ._

_' why don't you be honest for once Teresa ..you have been having nightmares .. I am so sorry she chose you .. you should be carefull what you wish for '._

_the woman kept talking and she was gasping for breathe , every thing was getting fuzzier and her vision blurred ._

_so she got up suddenly without a word and ran out of the tent ..she felt sick , it was raining ..it was so cold but it had been for a while and she was used to it by now ._

_she ran to her car and started the engine ..she was running into the storm of a moonless night ..from her thoughts probably , too fast ..who care ? ._

_he died ...teresa , I love you …I hate you …wish he would just get out of my life …you got your wish too ... I love him ._

_she couldn't stop the tears and she felt like her mind would explode any minute and the pain ..that whole in her chest getting wider ._

_his smile was the last thing she saw before the car fell over the cliff ._

_**sorry for another evil cliffhanger ..reviews are so nice .**_


	4. Chapter 4

**sorry for taking so long to update but real life was ughh **

**Disclaimer :I don't own anything .**

_she heard a soft voice calling her name bringing her back from the oblivious ..she tried to open her eyes but the sun rays forced them to close , when the voice spoke again and she felt a hand playing with a strand of her hair 'mummy we are here 'said the soft voice again and again ._

_she tried harder this time and her eyes snapped open to a pair of a warm blue eyes sitting by her side staring at her ._

_Her mind couldn't adjust to her surroundings for a moment , but blinking several times containing her confusion and the pain in her head , she eyed the place slowly and carefully ._

_The first thing she had to wrap her mind around was the little boy sitting by her side calling her mummy who didn't seem to be older than five ._

_'good morning mummy ' said the little boy with a grin ._

_she was stunned not understanding how to cope with that when the door opened and some one entered the room , and stood still both him and her heart for a moment then his face broke into a grin ._

' _hey ..welcome back 'he said cheerfully before jumping at her side , taking her hand and kissing her knuckle 'you are gonna be fine . my dear 'he said and she felt the tears accumulating in her eyes not believing what she was seeing ..it was a dream , she decided ..it had to be a dream , right ?_

_she took a deep breathe and cleared her throat then tried to talk 'are you ..real ' it was like a whisper and her heart leap at his smile ._

_'of course i am teresa ..the doctor said that you are gonna be just fine ..it's just a concussion '_

_she hated this if this was a dream then she should have woke up now because she wanted to ..right ? ,after second thought she didn't really care any more ..maybe the destiny was giving her a second chance or maybe she was dead and that was heaven .. she would just go along with it ._

_'what happened to me 'she asked and he sighed 'you don't remember ..you were chasing a suspect with the car when he pushed you out of the road , you hit a tree and your head ...but the doctor said that there was no serious damage 'he tried to assure her then he was interrupted by the little girl that she hadn't noticed that was in his hands , 'dad 'she called him , she looked younger than the boy ..of course she thought ..only his kids will have those beautiful faces and eyes ..omg they must be their kids in that alternate universe or some thing ..how could that be possible ._

_He held the little girl and gave her to lisbon and she felt butterflies in her heart but a lot of pain at the same time when the girl reached to hug her , she couldn't hold her tears putting her hand around the little girl ._

_'Jane reached for the boy seating him in his lap 'mummy is fine now Arthur ..don't worry ' he said ._

_She gently brushed the boy's cheek with her free hand ' i am fine ' she said assuring him ._

_Jane smiled 'come on ella 'he said carrying the little girl and taking the boy's hand 'we are going to get us something to eat ..don't worry teresa , sleep and tomorrow we are going home '._

_After they had left she sat there a long time thinking about every thing and the only conclusion she reached that this could be a chance because it seemed to be so real to her ..it was what she had always wanted ..the family life she had wanted with the man she had loved 'Jane ' and she didn't care about anything else ._

_The next day she was charged from the hospital and patrick came to pick her up alone to what he said was ..their house and she couldn't wait to see how was that ._

_They stopped in front of a two story beautiful house with a small garden and many similar houses surrounding it in a beautiful full of trees street ._

_As she entered the house there was a young girl holding the little girl grinning , she was a school girl so lisbon just concluded that she was a baby sitter , 'welcome back ..Mrs jane 'she said and teresa's heart fluttered at her new family name 'thank you 'she said then hugged the two kids in a tight embrace an embrace she had longed for for a long time , she hadn't even met them a day before and she already loved and missed their warmness ._

_'you need rest now , teresa 'jane said and the sitter took the two kids to give get them some thing to eat ._

_Teresa walked through the whole house it was so classy but warm just the way she had wished home to be and when she reached the bedroom she couldn't help but stare at the wall full of family photos ._

_There were a few photos that she recognized and her heart sank ..they were real photos ..one was taken at one of the fund raise parties at the CBI when the old team where still to gather and she could remember every moment of them taking that photo , they were the good times before jane left for those six months to vegas her heart ached at the memory ..It was like the silence before the storm . _

_she couldn't believe how could a photo bring up so many feelings and her eyes scanning the wall she saw __a photo of her in a hospital bed carrying a baby rapped in a blue blanket and jane was sitting his arm around her admiring the baby with a joy that she had never witnessed all those years she had known him ..It must have been the birth of Arthur ._

_It was all too much to take and she started sobbing when she felt a gentle hand on her shoulder ..a one that she had recognized so she turned around to look in patrick's worried blue eyes ._

_'what's wrong. teresa ,you look as if something had been bothering you since you woke up in the hospital 'he asked softly ._

_she shook her head smiling with the tears still falling on her cheeks 'no..thing ' she said struggling to breathe but finally feeling in peace ..it was real ..every thing , she told her self 'i think i just had a horrible nightmare ' she said and he smiled kissing her tears 'it's ok , I was scared too ..when they called me , I didn't know if I had lost you for ever and it was like knives cutting into my chest but ...you are home now ' ._

_she leaned in his embrace feeling intoxicated by his scent and couldn't believe how much she had missed him .. it was like breathing again .. living again 'no , i am in heaven 'she said burying her nose in his shoulder , she heard him saying softly 'no , dear you are in hell '._

_Her world collapsed .. her eyes flipped open gasping for air to find herself in a room .. a hospital room ._

_'welcome back 'said a nurse that was checking her IV ._

_'omg..omg 'repeated teresa sobbing and shaking in the bed 'please no ..not again 'she screamed ._

_**Thank u for reading ..so if u still like it and wanted It to go on u know what to do ..reviews appreciated .**_


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